Seeing the word TRUTH! in giant letters on the front page of the Post is surprising (like a headline of PORK! on the front page of Keeping Kosher Daily). The reference is to Benjamin “Bibi” Netanyahu’s post-Ahmadinejad speech at the United Nations (the subhead is “Bibi puts scoundrels to shame at the UN“).

“Yesterday, the man who called the Holocaust a lie spoke from this podium. To those who refused to come and to those who left in protest, I commend you. To those who gave this Holocaust denier a hearing, I say on behalf of my people, the Jewish people, and decent people everywhere: Have you no shame? Have you no decency?”

He also brandished the blueprints for the Auschwitz-Birkenau concentration camp and the minutes from the 1942 Wannsee Conference, asking “Is this a lie?”

I have a feeling that there will be a whole bunch of editorials in today’s paper about how the UN is a farce and that Obama is an idiot for trying to reason with Iran.

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The city’s Health Department has bedbugs in its tuberculosis-prevention unit.

(if you know what I mean)

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Rosie? Did you replace Kirsten Dunst in court? Or was that actually Kirsten Dunst ruining her own reputation?

It seems as though she “giggled” throughout her testimony (against James Jimenez, who stole her purse from the Soho Grand).

More disturbing is the fact that Simon Pegg also testified (Jimenez stole his stuff, too), but wasn’t famous enough to merit a photo or a quote. Boo.

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Page 4 is a full-page full-color ad for Victoria Gotti’s book (and the exclusive 4-part excerpt running in the Post).

The book has a man on the cover in a dress and wig… sorry, that’s Victoria Gotti. Oof.

The book promises to reveal:

* John Gotti’s intimate secrets

* How his wife and kids lived in fear

* Never before seen family photos.

The book is referred to on its cover as “The No-Holds-Barred Truth About Life Inside the Gotti Dynasty — Told By Their Most Famous Daughter” which may be grammatically incorrect (I haven’t decided yet).

I can’t wait to forget about it.

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Six in ten New Yorkers think Obama is wrong to try and oust Paterson.

I think they should have asked more than ten New Yorkers.

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Scientists have discovered that the moon has water on its surface.

And twenty-three Starbucks.

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There’s a picture of Courtney Love shaking hands and posing with Hugo Chavez.

Regardless of your political leanings, can we all just agree that Courtney Love is hard to look at and riddled with communicable diseases?

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“D.C. Bureau Chief” Charles Hurt has an editorial (“World’s cowards exposed“) that accuses the UN of being a farce (“that you — the struggling taxpayer — foot the bill for”).

“The only thing more criminal than sitting there listening to the lies and pure hate of these lunatics is standing there idly by watching history repeat itself.”

Wait… the Holocaust is happening again?

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Mackenzie Phillips gets all of page 9 to herself — book sales must be gangbusters! (a quick peek at amazon.com shows Dan Brown’s The Lost Symbol in the #1 slot, followed by Glenn Beck’s new coloring book [Glenn Beck is #2! LOLZ!], then Ted Kennedy’s posthumous memoir, then Mackenzie! You go, girl!)

So how has her story heightened since yesterday? What possible new revelation rears its head?

She fucked Mick Jagger was she was 18. And he told her that he had been waiting to fuck her since she was 10.

Any regrets? “I was proud of my conquest. Or of having been conquested.”

She also boasts of seducing the niece of one of Andy Warhol’s “cronies” at a party hosted by the Kennedy family.

Oh, and she took drugs while pregnant. And so did her stepmom when she was pregnant with Bijou (hilariously, Mackenzie claims that her stepmom regretted doing so and would later kick Mackenzie, screaming, “It’s your fault Bijou’s retarded!”).

Anything else, Mac? Any more names to drop/sully? Did Pat Harrington molest you? No? Then back to obscurity with you!

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This is mad helpful, yo.

According to my awesome paper, the following five over-the-counter ingredients can be mixed to “unleash mass destruction.”

Have a pen handy?

Hydrogen peroxide, hydrochloric acid, acetone, flour and ghee oil.

Thanks, Post!

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Time for a fun time-wasting quiz!

steakhouseorgaybar.com

You’re welcome!

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Lamar Odom is marrying Khloe Kardashian on Sunday. They’ve been dating for a month.

Will their marriage last as long?

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Remember Madonna’s touching speech about Michael Jackson (and, more importantly, herself) at the VMA’s? Well, she obviously didn’t know what MJ thought about her… but now we do — thanks to an old videotaped interview with Rabbi Shmuley Boteach!

“Is there a lot of jealousy in your profession?” asked the Jew.

“Absolutely and M is one of them. Madonna,” replied the pedophile.

Am I being too cruel to Mr. Jackson? Before you answer, read this:

“I’ve seen children just shower all over me with love. They want to just touch me and hug me and completely just hold on and cry and not let go… and mothers pick their babies and put them into my arms — ‘Touch my baby, and hold them, touch my baby, touch my baby.’”

For more revolting excerpts, watch Shmuley on upcoming episodes of Dateline and Today.

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I’ve mentioned (repeatedly) that Randy Quaid is banned-for-life from Actors’ Equity and will therefore never set foot on a union stage again. What I just learned is that, at the hearing Actors’ Equity held to discuss Quaid’s punishment, his wife got into a fight with the 76-year-old receptionist “that ended with the receptionist bleeding from the shins and Evi Quaid’s finger broken.” But all of this is old news.

The new news is that Randy and Evi was arrested by Texas police near the Mexican border yesterday. They were charged with skipping out on a $10,000 hotel bill (in California). During the arrest, Evi fought with police. They’re charged with burglary, defrauding an innkeeper and conspiracy.

I wonder how “defrauding an innkeeper” differs from defrauding, say, an Avon lady.

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What hot gossip do you have for me today, Cindy Adams?

“And at the Emmy’s gift lounge, Charlie Sheen was deeply into Lipton Tea’s cranberry pomegranate flavor.”

(slowly backs away)

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I was initially excited by the first sentence… until I read the next one.

“The ugly ducklings of the subway system are finally on track for makeovers. Fifty decrepit, ignored and possibly dangerous stations — some in the farthest-flung areas of the system — have been slated for at least partial renovations in the next five years, according to MTA documents.”

Oh boy! In the next five years, some stations will get at least partial renovations! According to documents!

“You can stop standing on his throat now, Jed.”

“Never.”

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The Center for Consumer Freedom took out a full-page ad asking “Big Apple or Big Brother?”

They take offense at the current anti-soft drink climate.

I did a little research: the CCF was originally the Guest Choice Network. Which was started in 1995 with just $600,000. Donated by the Philip Morris tobacco company. To fight restaurants that were banning smoking.

Other battles the CCF fights include keeping the legal blood-alcohol level for drivers at 0.10, Charlotte’s Web’s anti-bacon message, and the re-implementation of trans fats in just about everything.

What a bunch of assholes.

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Anybody need another reason to hate South Carolina?

One of its residents decided to propose to his girlfriend by standing 150 lit candles in side paper bags on a beach in Hilton Head, which led to the deaths of dozens of loggerhead sea turtle hatchlings.

The federally-protected turtles were confused by the lights and got confused on their way to the water. They were all eaten by crabs.

I imagine that, later that evening, he gave her different crabs.

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Another editorial about how awful the UN is (I told you so).

And Bill O’Reilly suggests that it might be time to build a giant ark. He lists some the problems in the world (Iran’s nuclear weapons, Mexico’s drug problems, Afghanistan is “falling apart”) and then commends Obama for pleading with the UN to help fix these problems.

But the sentence that’s blown up and embedded in the middle of the column is “It must be tough for Obama to sleep at night.”

The full sentence is, “It must be tough for Obama to sleep at night knowing the world is such a malevolent place.”

Nowhere in the column does he actually criticize what Obama is doing, which makes his opined opinion (that Obama doesn’t sleep well) out of place. The truncated version, even moreso.

And I wasn’t kidding about the ark. O’Reilly really is that insane.

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Is Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer going bankrupt? Maybe!

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OK! Magazine is paying $300,000 for exclusive photos of Khloe Kardashian’s wedding.

(waves miniature American flag)

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Lou Lumenick gives the remake of Fame one star (and titles his review “LAME!”). Good one, Lou!

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I keep seeing ads for Pandorum, but I don’t know anything about it. Looks creepy. And it stars the Quaid brother that isn’t in jail.

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Just watched the trailer for Pandorum online. If you mixed Event Horizon with the “Space Madness” episode of Ren & Stimpy, you’d pretty much have this movie.

“From the producers of the Resident Evil movies” doesn’t exactly entice me, either.

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Kyle Smith gives The Surrogates three stars and proclaims that he liked it more than District 9 (which he gave two stars).

Which makes me realize that it’s been weeks (if not months) since I saw Pete Hammond’s name in a movie ad.

I hope he’s OK.

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Boston won, Texas lost. There is no more Wild Card race.

Is there a chance that Boston takes the AL East? Yes. Do I care? No.

Let them kick our asses for the next three days… if it means that we can return the favor when it counts.

The fact that Joba is starting tonight does give me agita, though.

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According to the Post’s Boston/New York matchups (who has the edge in our 3-game series), Boston has the advantage in left field (Jason Bay over, ironically, Johnny Damon), center field (Ellsbury over Melky) and manager (Francona over Girardi). The Yanks have the advantage at first base (Teixeira over Youkilis), shortstop (Jeter over Gonzalez), third base (A-Rod over Lowell), and starting pitching (despite Joba starting).

Everything else is “even.”

First game is at 7:00 tonight. Hold my calls.

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MTV is looking to air the eight completed episodes of DJ AM’s drug-intervention reality series, Gone Too Far.

Which they might have.

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Michael Starr, who hates Mad Men for some reason, wants you all to know that Selena Gomez shopped for Artist Jeans at American Eagle in L.A.

Keep up the extraordinary work, Mike!

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The writers at CSI wanted Laurence Fishburne’s character to get a promotion (LF agreed), to have a wife (LF agreed) and to be from Brooklyn.

“They wanted to make my character from Brooklyn, which is where I’m from, and I thought, ‘Wouldn’t it be more interesting if they made him from some place like, Seoul?’”

Uh… no?

Watch the new season of CSI and you’ll learn that Laurence Fishburne’s character was born in… Seoul!

Great job, Larry!

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And that, as they say, is that.

The weekend is less than 6 hours away.

And now I’m off to buy groceries! I am manly!