The first number is how many US soldiers died in Afghanistan in 2008.

The second number is how many US soldiers have died there since we started the war in 2001 (up to Oct. 31st, 2009).

The last number is the number of US soldiers (all under 65 years of age) who died in 2008 as a result of not having health insurance.

Happy Veterans’ Day.

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According to today’s front page, if you were to buy one Birds Eye Boxed Vegetables In Sauce (8-10 oz.), you would be given 2 additional Birds Eye Boxed Vegetables In Sauce (8-10 oz.) — FOR FREE. That’s 3 for the price of one! That, coupled with a 50% off all Perdue Boneless Breast, Thin Sliced Breast or Tenders, makes for a very rewarding trip to Pathmark. Also on sale is…

Wait. This is a Pathmark circular.

Hang on.

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Ah. The New York Post. Here we go.

As I told you yesterday, a former employee of the NYP is suing them and pulling the curtain back on their behind-the-scenes shenanigans (both in and out of print). Charles “Punch Me ‘Til I” Hurt is accused of telling the staff that the newspaper’s mission was (and remains) the destruction of our nation’s commander-in-chief.

Puke Genitalia (sorry, Ralph Peters) and Charles and a few other Post “regulars” have been criticizing everything Obama has said (and hasn’t said) with regard to the Fort Hood shootings. Yesterday, Obama spoke at Fort Hood. I listened to his speech and thought it did justice to the men and women who were a part of that senseless attack. Would the Post, with fresh allegations of their unreasonable bias against Obama being aired in public, find fault with him and his speech?

Was the Pope a member of the Hitler Youth Movement?

The excerpt of Obama’s speech that the paper chose to put on their cover is “This is a time of war. And yet these Americans did not die on a foreign field of battle. They were killed here, on American soil.”

Page 4 has a small photo of each fallen soldier and part of what Obama said about each one.

Page 5 (PRESIDENT PAYS SOLEMN TRIBUTE) begins, “President Obama paid touching personal tributes to the 13 brave soldiers…” and his speech is referred to as “emotional remarks” in the following paragraph.

Paragraph #3 (the fourth sentence of the article): “‘It may be hard to comprehend the twisted logic that led to this tragedy,’ the commander-in-chief said, without ever naming Maj. Nidal Malik Hasan, the gunman who reportedly shouted ‘Allahu akbar’ during his rampage and had known ties to Islamic extremists.” Once again, fault has been found where others might find restraint.

Charles Hurt has a piece on page 6 that goes a step or two (or 38) further. Commander sets the right tone for once begins, “With a pained face and a voice laced with somber reverence, President Obama yesterday properly mourned the dead and wounded at Fort Hood.” That’s kind of a compliment, right? “As leg-tingling Obama speeches go, it was fine.” Uh… thanks? “The president properly stowed his most soaring oratory for this occasion because it really wasn’t about him and his legendary speechifying.” He also didn’t decorate a Christmas tree or carve a Thanksgiving turkey or play some of his legendary basketball with his friends, because it wasn’t the time for any of those things either. “‘Your loved ones endure through the life of our nation,’ he said, using the most exalting language he has ever used to describe our military.” OK, now you’re just being an asshole, Charles. Your hyperbole is always inappropriate, but especially in this context.

Michael Goodwin (more on him later) also reprimands Obama (POETIC PIROUETTE AROUND TRUTH). “A military setting brings out the best in President Obama’s eloquence, and yesterday’s Fort Hood memorial was no exception.” So… you liked it? “Yet Obama stopped short of calling the attack what it obviously was: terrorism, even treason, committed by an Army major against defenseless comrades. He hinted, but this disappointing dodge was achieved only through a parade of tortured inconsistencies.” I thought you supported torture, Mike. But, OK. Give me an example of a tortured inconsistency. “He said we are ‘in a time of war,’ but called the attack a ‘tragedy.’” Goodwin, I should note, suffers from tortured incontinence.

The Post’s editorial page includes more “praise” for Obama (‘To Protect Our People’). “In stirring, eloquent and typically well-delivered remarks, President Obama yesterday paid tribute to the 13 people gunned down in last week’s Fort Hood shooting rampage — and to all the members of the US armed forces.” That he didn’t mention Hasan’s name is mentioned (in the third sentence), but it applauds Obama for “plac[ing] the shooting, appropriately, in the context of “the extremists who killed nearly 3,000 Americans” on 9/11.” That’s funny because Goodwin used that exact same quote to illustrate another tortured inconsistency. The piece also slams Gen. George Casey and Lt. Gen. Robert Cone (“They merely referred obliquely to the ‘tragedy,’ the ‘horrific event,’ the “incident’ and the ‘crime scene.’”) who also didn’t (possibly erroneously) draw connections between 9/11 and Fort Hood.

Remember when Bush drew connections between Saddam Hussein and 9/11? Remember how they were later disproven? Remember how people in this country still insist that they weren’t? But, yeah. Better that Obama should have made a judgement without having all of the facts.

And what of Michelle Malkin? She mocks Obama for saying that the twisted logic that led to this tragedy may be too hard to comprehend. “What exactly is so hard to comprehend?” she asks before she insists that Muslims can’t be trusted. And she finds pure evil and stupidity in our Justice Department’s desire to use “criminal and civil-rights laws to protect Muslim Americans.”

This is truly a horrible newspaper.

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Word on the street was that the state Senate would vote yesterday on same-sex marriage in New York.

Today, we learn that the vote was “put off” but that Gov. Paterson assured everyone that the bill will be put up for a vote “at a date not certain between now and the end of the year.”

Wait. Does he mean that it will be voted on in 2009? Or that, by the end of the year, they’ll know when they’ll eventually vote on it for certain?

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United Airlines, you just made the list (again).

A pilot for the airline was pulled out of the plane he was moments away from flying (from Heathrow to Chicago) because his co-workers noticed he was drunk.

I want to know how the pilot could afford alcohol on his salary.

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A judge in Los Angeles has declared that Ojani Noa can’t release How I Married Jennifer Lopez: The J.Lo and Ojani Noa Story pending another hearing on December 1st.

Thank you, your honor.

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New New York license plates? Ugly. Really really ugly.

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You know what? I lied. The rest of what Michael Goodwin has to say today isn’t worth repeating.

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Ricky Carmona was executed last night by lethal injecton.

I meant John Allen Muhammad.

This is a photo of Muhammad:

and this is a photo of my friend, Ricky:

You can understand my confusion.

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Great political cartoon in Page Six (today on page 12). A US soldier has his back turned to a fellow soldier who has Arabic features and POLITICAL CORRECTNESS written on his uniform and is about to stab him in the back.

If I were a Muslim in the US armed forces, I’d turn in my uniform and never look back. Seriously. As long as people in this country continue to question whether Muslims should be allowed to put themselves in harm’s way for the sake of the nation, it’s just not worth the headache (not to mention worrying that your Bible-thumping buddies will beat you with soap-bar-filled socks).

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Steven Tyler and Joe Perry are now insisting that Aerosmith hasn’t broken up.

Whew!

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The clues were there all along!

In May of 2008, Dominic Carter was at an NAACP meeting in Corona when he said, “I know who the good guys are. [Hiram Monserrate] is a guy who our community can trust… He is someone I trust and I know is one of the good guys.”

It’s Woody and Roman all over again.

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Oprah will feature the woman whose face was mauled by a chimpanzee on today’s show. Which is weird, because I thought Palin’s show was on the 16th.

Oh, wait. Palin’s face wasn’t mauled by a chimp. I dreamed that. Never mind.

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Sammy Sosa insists that he is not intentionally lightening his skin. See, he uses “a bleaching cream that I apply before going to bed… I use [it] to soften [my skin], but [it] has bleached me some.”

Got that? He uses a bleaching cream to soften his skin and is surprised to discover that it also bleaches. He also seemed shocked that the skin moisturizer that he uses as shampoo moisturizes his scalp.

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Bernie Kerik is under house arrest until his sentencing in February. Kerik asked if he could walk his kids to and from school. The judge said no.

“This is not home confinement with morning strolls and afternoon strolls,” he told the pouty-faced former NYPD Commissioner.

Ouch.

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ConEd will raise gas prices 6% next year.

And 6% the following year.

And 6% the year after that.

ConEd is a jerk.

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Ashlee Simpson will take over the role of Roxie Hart in Chicago this December.

Was Octomom not available?

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It looks like John Lackey won’t be returning to the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim next year. The team has made some underwhelming offers that he’s turned down, so they’ll let him go to another team.

As an MLB executive said, “What do the Angels know about John Lackey that we all don’t?”

Indeed.

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Derek Jeter and Mark Teixeira won Gold Gloves. This was Derek’s fourth and Mark’s third.

Go Yanks.

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Johnny Damon’s agent, Scott Boras, believes that his client should get a 4-year contract. He says that whatever they’re offering Jeter is roughly what they should offer Johnny.

Thanks for everything, Johnny. Have fun playing wherever it is you end up playing.

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The Jay Leno Show For Some Reason continues to shed viewers. But think of how much money NBC is saving by not felling obligated to broadcast good television!

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Omarosa is getting her own dating show! Omarosa’s Ultimate Merger will feaure 12 “men” from whom Omarosa will try to find a mate.

That reminds me: Whither New York?

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Happy Wednesday!