Archive for February 10th, 2010

Goodbye, Hiram.

10th February
2010
written by jed

Last night, the state Senate voted to expel Hiram Monserrate from their ranks.

That’s one.

“Sen. Ruben Diaz Sr. (D-Bronx) suggested he might make good on his threat to leave the Democratic conference because of the action against Monserrate, an ally and a fellow Puerto Rican.”

That’d be two.

Ain’t progress grand?

But today’s front page news (Hiram’s on page 3) is how Bronx City Councilman Larry Seabrook has been hit with a 13-count federal indictment — they say he has stolen $1,200,000 from taxpayers. One of the (smaller) examples is the headline: $177 BAGEL (he doctored a receipt so that the $7.00 charge became $177.00).

I’m actually more concerned with the initial $7.00 charge (what did he get on it? Gold?). Never mind — it was a sammich.

The rest of the $1,199,833 came from kickbacks (like $50,000 from the boiler company that he helped award the Yankee Stadium contract), funneling money to his girlfriend’s “non-profit” organizations ($300,000 to provide mentoring and training to minorities to help them join the NYPD — which they actually did), and other par-for-the-course shenanigans.

Politics, especially the local kind, infuriate me.

But just when you think they’re all rotten…

…City Hall declared yesterday Alligators in the Sewers Day, commemorating the 75th anniversary of the urban legend.

Your tax dollars at rest.

The guy who secretly videotaped Erin Andrews through a hotel door’s peephole had 16 other victims he did the same (or similar) things to.

He could have gotten up to five years in prison. He is expected to get a 27-month sentence.

Why does this country hate women and children so much?

Lil Wayne was supposed to start his one-year jail sentence yesterday, but he got a one-month reprieve so that he can “finish up some major dental surgery.”

“This was an ongoing course of treatment involving bone grafts,” said Stacey Richman (his attorney).

And by bone grafts, she means bling.

The Post congratulates the president of the Toyota Motor Corp. for bowing at a 60º angle yesterday, as opposed to his previous 40º angle (TOYODA’S NEW LOW).

See what they did there?

Michael Goodwin is excrementastic.

For the teeny Farewell, Murtha, he writes only: “Mother always cautioned against speaking ill of the dead, so I will say nothing about Pennsylvania Congressman John Murtha.”

What a dick. He also credits Obama with being the sole reason “three-quarters of the public are angry at government.”

“If he were a Republican, the liberal media would be calling him the Great Divider instead of the Great Uniter. Double standard? You betcha!”

There’s more, but I’m tired of reading this ass-clown’s partisan whining.

More space is given to Robert Gibbs’ mocking of Sarah Palin than was given to Sarah Palin for having to read “Energy” off her hand during a Q & A at a convention for the mentally handicapped (Bam’s ham is heavy handed).

Was Gibbs’ joke funny (he wrote a shopping list for pancakes and “hope” and “change” on his hand)? Not really. Was it as frightening as what Palin needed to do? Not by a mile.

Paul Anka’s wife got a temporary restraining order against him last week, claiming he pulled a gun on her and threatened to kill her and her nanny (why does Paul Anka’s wife need a nanny?).

(the nanny is for the 4-year-old that the 68-year-old Anka had with the woman almost half his age)

Anka claims she’s lying and “needs medical help.”

It’s like the story of Phil Spector and the story of Anna Nicole Smith had a story-baby!

Rachel Uchitel (Tiger Woods’ Mistress #1, for those keeping score) was interviewed by Mario Lopez last night on Extra.

The producers were “so impressed” that she will become a “special correspondent” for the awful TV show.

Maybe she can interview Ashley Dupre!

The Asians of Atlanta are angry. The city’s rail agency recently renamed the line that runs through the heart of their community “the yellow line.”

As a make-good, the city announced that they will offer the Asian community a special discount program wherein a purchase of six tickets will get you eggroll.

The guy in charge of dispersing the money raised by NOAH-F had his New York law license revoked in 2002 “after a string of improprieties” including withholding information and lying to a judge in open court when he was an ADA.

He also had his Washington, D.C. law license revoked.

Claude N. Stuart, 48, ladies and gentlemen.

E.J. McMahon & Nicole Gelinas offer Derailing New York: MTA may sink whole state and it’s worth a read.

They’re war criminals, I tells ya.

Three idiots wrote letters to the Post to explain why they, too, are outraged that Rahm Emanuel called people “retarded.”

Even though he didn’t (he said “retards”).

Take a bow, Oren M. Spiegler, J. O’Brien and Ellen Danzis. You’re all retarded.

And not one of them mentioned Rush Limbaugh.

Michelle Malkin is back, screaming at Obama for being something or other.

If you can get a copy of the paper, check page 33. Is it just me or is her left eye getting larger and moving farther away from her nose?

The Quest For Five Wins continues tonight as the 4-47 Nets (7.8%) face Milwaukee (23-27, 46%).

OK. I have to brave the snowy snows to coach, then make a doctor’s appointment back in Brooklyn, then go back to Manhattan for an evening of coaching.

Pray for me.


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